Month: August 2017

SUNDAY 118

Time: 16:30
Place: Home

A long weekend this week. Didnt do a lot of productive work but spent some quality time with friends. Mr. B gave a treat yesterday at Windmills. It was fun. The gang have planned for a trip to South Africa in October. They want us to come too. I would like to go but I can’t afford the trip right now.

Wells Fargo didn’t get back to me. I will send them an email tomorrow and ask them about what is going on. The Mrs got a call for interview with Accenture. The interview might be scheduled in the coming couple of weeks. I hope it goes well for her.

OCM shadowing is about to start in the coming weeks. Its becoming very difficult to deal with now. I haven’t done much work with  Mercedes too this past few weeks. It is going to catch up on me very soon. I really need to get my act together fast.

4 day workout week. I did a good lower body workout yesterday after a long time. Legs really sore right now but its nice to get back in the groove. I need to make a 5 day workout week next week.

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SUNDAY 117

Time: 09:04
Place: Home

An up and down week. I was stuck in the escalation with iQor till Monday. Tuesday was a holiday and I visited Nellore for the wedding on Wednesday. I received a call on Wednesday from Wells Fargo. They wanted to do a manager round. I attended the interview on Friday and it went well.

The problem with Wells Fargo is that the work is not that great. Its mostly going to be maintenance work on Exadata machines. The other problem is the location of the work. I can choose between Bangalore and Hyderabad but I cannot change my location once I join. That makes planning our logistics very difficult. Do I join in Bangalore and commit to being here for the next 2 years at least. Or do I join in Hyderabad in leave the Mrs. here to fend for her own.

There are some positives though. At least its not L1, L2 work. They are building a team and are planning to go up to 20 from the current 5. It would be good to join such a team. They are migrating several applications onto Exadata. This means that there is going to be a lot of work in the coming 2 years. Good job security.

I wish there were more options for me to choose from. I feel as if I am standing with my 2 feet on 2 separate boats, and the boats are moving in different directions. The escalation over the last weekend would not have happened if I had been focused on my work. OCM work will start sooner or later and I will need to get ready. I don’t have the time to dilly-dally.

I had a long discussion with the Mrs. today. We talked about what we should do if Wells did end up giving me an offer. It would be a difficult decision to make, so I gave her a week to make up her mind.

Meanwhile, I will spend as of time as possible this week preparing for the last technical round in Wells.

SUNDAY 116

Time: 10:04
Place: Home

I’m back. 4 months after my last Sunday post. 9 Months into my marriage. I am back to regularly writing the Sunday posts. Hopefully.

Continuing the theme of being stuck from the last post. I have had some time to reflect on my situation. It has been almost 2 months since I posted my resume to companies. I managed 2 referrals, one of which went to interviews. There has been no progress whatsoever.

There is only so much I can do. There is no point in being hard on myself and feeling down.  I need to accept my situation and adapt to the framework. It does not however mean that I abandon all ambitions. I need to be prepared for any opportunities that come my way as well.

So what’s my situation?

It’s been tough financially. Me and the Mrs have just 40K balance in the account. The Mrs. has completed paying off her marriage loans this month but will need to start paying her Education loan starting next month. At this rate it seems like I would end the year with net savings of 1L. I can’t even use that to pay advance for my next place if I move.

About moving: There would be no moving. I have been grumbling about having to stay so far away and having to spend so much time travelling to the office. I need to get used to the fact that I will be staying in the same place the rest of this year at least. No furniture as well. Living with minimal comforts doesn’t really bother me. I have lived this way for a long time.

Work: OCM work will start eventually. I will need to put in a lot of effort to scale up. That will affect the amount of time that I have for self skill development and to stay fresh for interviews.

So:
1. Budget is tight.
2. I stay in the same shitty place.
3. I struggle at work.

Looking at the bright side:
1. I will still end up with 10L in total career savings by end of this year. Most of them are immovable assets but they still count.
2. Its not so bad. Its quiet and breezy and not smelly.
3. I got an outstanding rating so I should get a promotion and a raise. Also Oracle is doing good relatively so its not a bad place to be at right now.

So the framework. How do I best utilize my time to continue a good career, and to stay happy?

The chat that I had with Chaman had some benefits. I am off the hook for this month at least. I can put off travelling to OTP for the rest of this month. I can continue travelling to PTP. I have a good opportunity to sit with the Apps folks and to learn from them. It will definitely do good to my career. I have reached saturation with regards to database certifications anyway. Adding Apps certifications will go a long way in improving my career and employability.

So I have a 3 pronged strategy: I spend time on OCM, Interviews and Apps. With regards to interviews, I think its best I do test cases every day. Working on test cases will give me real experience. 3 hours on each should keep me busy this month. It will not be easy however. Maintaining focus on 3 different things at the same time is very challenging. I have never done it in my life. I will get mentally fatigued and frustrated. I will once again use this journal as a medium to vent my frustration and to track and motivate myself.

Jai ho!

Stuck

I am coming back to writing in this journal after 4 months. I did feel the need to write more often during this time, but did not want it enough to actually invest the time.

This Journal has been my solace during difficult times. It kept me going when I had little control over other aspects of my life. It helped me deal with loss, disappointment and depression. And now I am back. Why?

I have been married for 8 months now. Life was progressing at a decent pace till recently but has come to a grinding halt now. I need change in life. I cannot bear being the same or doing the same things day in and day out.

I have these plans that I make up in my mind. I have a need to implement those plans. When factors external to me stop me from doing what I want to do, I feel helpless and unhappy. I am in such a state right now.

I don’t feel settled where I am right now. I do not like the home that I stay in. I having been planning to move out from a while now. But move where? I wanted to move to Hyderabad. My “grand” plan was that the Mrs. would get a job in Hyderabad and then I would take a transfer from Oracle and then we would move to Hyderabad and live happily for ever.

That didn’t happen. Its been 4 months and the Mrs. hasn’t received a single call. I have pushed her till the point where it affected our relationship. She says she is trying. I don’t see any results so I don’t know if she is trying enough. But there is no way for me to know. I can only rely on what she tells me. And what she tells me is that either there or no jobs for her experience or she doesn’t have the time to prepare for interviews.

At one point I decided to stop pushing her and instead focus on myself. I wanted to change my own job and then look at what we could do about hers. For 4 weeks I worked hard to prepare for interviews and I applied to all the good companies. I am yet to receive a single call.

I can’t change my job and she can’t change her job so we are stuck where we are. Its not just the location that is the problem. We need more money. We need the raise in salary that a job change will bring us. We have too many loans right now and no savings. I want to live a better lifestyle but I need more disposable money to do that.

I have dealt with much worse before. The real challenge is with my work. I don’t have good work left to do in Oracle. I am not interested in the work that is going to come. I have been pretty much idle these last 2 months. The idle time is affecting my thinking and making things even worse.

I think the symptoms of my ailment match mid life crisis. Mid life crisis at 28?  That is too bad.

So what can I do to deal with this phase of my life?

I think the first thing I should focus on is my life. I feel good about myself when I am fit. I am not fit right now. I have averaged one day in the gym for the last few months. I need to do better than that.

What else can I do better?