Even as I write this, I have the sensation that I am currently living the toughest period of my life yet. I think the episode with Arunachalam was easier compared to this. Atleast I could see an end there. I had company of friends. I had a purpose. What do I have now? A taxing period of stagnation with no end in sight.
Is this the worst possible position that I can be in? Definitely not. Will I ever have such difficult periods in my life again? Of course I will. For better or for worse, this is an experience for me. I can either continue to wallow in self pity or I can learn from this experience. I am not in this position because of some mistake of mine. I’m a victim of circumstance. Is this right? Calling myself a victim.. I am not looking at the bright side. But what bright side? I don’t see any bright side.
“When the going gets tough, the tough get going”. I would do well to implement this lesson in my life. Sketching a principle on your body doesn’t necessarily bring you to living it. The lesson will slip through your mind along with the pain. One can only be shown the path, it is his will that determines whether he follows it or not.
“Patience” and “Endurance”, the two canon’s tattooed on my left arm will stay with me the rest of my life. Was getting the tattoo a mistake? It is up to me to provide an answer to this question. I showed myself the path. Now I need to walk it.
“When the going gets tough, the tough get going.”
I have a point to prove to myself. I am not a kid anymore. I can handle the shit life decides to throw at me. I can be bigger than my problems. I can smile,even in pain. I can vindicate my past actions, I can set an example for my future. I can drive myself out of this quagmire. I will find the highway.. I will cruise.
“When the going gets tough, the tough get going”
Time for me to get going.