Month: July 2012

Where we stand….

Half the season’s gone in Tennis and Formula1 while new seasons are about to start for Arsenal and Team India. So where do we stand in all this?

Tennis: If Nadal’s 2nd round defeat in Wimbledon was bad, his injury forcing him out of the Olympics is disastrous. He was supposed to be the flag bearer for Spain in the Olympics and to be in a position were he couldn’t participate would be a huge blow to him personally. He has bounced back from injuries in the past. His defeat in the French open to Soderling in 2009, his subsequent injury and family problems put him through  a lot that year. But he worked through it and had a stunning 2010 season. He has won 4 titles this season, which is better than what he managed last season. So he’s still going to have a great season.

A few words for Federer here. I have always admired this guy for the quality of Tennis he plays and the way he carries himself. But he has now reached a new level in my eyes. To have the hunger and desire to win a grand slam after 2 years is incredible and really inspiring. Every person in this world of every age can learn something from him. If you have quality and believe in yourself, nobody can stop you from winning. Go Roger.

Formula1

The 10th race of the season starts today with Alonso at the top of the table with 129 points, 13 clear of Webber. He starts on pole today and if he wins this, he will have a clear lead going into the second half of the season. He has had fantastic victories till now and even though the Ferrari car has been off pace compared to the Redbull, he is still competing using sheer talent and great strategies. After  a long time, I’ll get to watch the race on t.v and I’m looking forward to it.

Soccer

The pre-season for Arsenal is underway and the start of the season is a month away. We would be in a great position for the start of the season if it weren’t for that bastard van-Persie. He declared that he wanted to leave and after the way he did it, I want the club to kick him out and get a new player. But that’s the problem. We need to find a new striker and someone who can hit the ground running and those types are hard to find given our financial constraints.

It’s great that we completed the Giroud and Podolski deals early so now we just need to make one more signing to be ready for the season start. Arsene Wenger has definitely done a great job this summer and I’m eagerly looking forward to the new season.

Cricket

We started our new season in style yesterday by beating Sri Lanka in the 5 match ODI series. Winning this series 5-0 will take us to the first spot but It’s going to be really difficult. I’m hoping we win this series and gather momentum going into the T-20 world cup. Virat Kohli’s century in yesterday’s victory deserves a mention. He has had a fantastic season till now scoring 830 runs this year. I hope his form continues like this.

Personally.

My spirits have been raised since last month and right now I am not that desperate to leave the company. The processing for the loan is going on and I’m looking forward to seeing the car in front of my house. Good times for Ferrari and me, hopeful for Arsenal and Team India and tough times for Nadal. Mixed baggage as always, but I need that to keep my feet firmly on the ground.

The thing that lasts..

Here’s a thought: The core or constituent of a person is the sum total of his memories and experiences. By person I mean a grown up. Somebody in mid 20’s maybe. Somebody whose actions are influenced more by his memories and experiences than instinct or impulse.

Why are memories important? How much of an impact does the past have on the now. The mundane everyday things are not affected. I wake up and brush my teeth everyday. The way I brush my teeth tomorrow would not be influenced by the way I brushed my teeth on 12th August 2011. What does it take for a memory to influence our action? A certain amount of thought process is definitely involved. For experiences from the past to influence our actions in the present, one needs to think back to the past and reflect on the memories. But we don’t do this for most of our normal activities.

A short list of my daily routine would go like: brush teeth, take a crap, go for a jog, take a bath, make breakfast, go check in, come back and do some shit, jerk off, eat, sleep, do some other shit, eat, jerk off, sleep. Which of these activities do my memories influence. None.

So are memories overrated? If I wake up tomorrow with no memory of my past, would I still do things the same way? Why is it that as we grow older, we increasingly make use of our memories to help decide our actions. Or do we?

I have always had an inquisitive mind. Always curious about the way things work. As I grow older, I increasingly feel the need to reason my actions. Why am I doing the things that I am doing. Is it affecting my life? Is it making any difference? What is the use? It is this kind of thinking that brought about my divorce with god.  I stopped myself on the tracks and asked myself: what is the use of going to the temple.  I have never in my adult memory asked the guy for anything for myself. I have always felt that my future is in my hands only.

I distinctly remember what my brother once said to me many many yeas ago. If I try to remember correctly, this memory could be close to 8 years old. I was 16 then. He said: “What happens to you in the next second is influenced by what you do in this second.” Simple words that stuck to my mind and never left. I have reflected on my brothers words lots of times since that day and I have increasingly found myself agreeing to his quote. So much so that it led to me losing faith in god when he himself still has faith. He wouldn’t like it if I blamed him for that though.

What does reasoning have to do with memories? And why do memories make up a person? I feel that memories are the things that give a person his sense self worth. When you think back to the times when you did things that made you feel good about yourself, made you feel proud, it influences your present. It makes you happier. If they are happy memories that is. What about sad memories? What do sad memories or embarrassing memories influence our present. They make us feel sad. And sad is bad.

So why shouldn’t a person replace sad memories with happy memories. Is living in denial so bad? I guess sad memories act in a way to teach us lessons in life. Help us grow to be better persons. But that brings me to a different topic altogether. Why should we try to be better persons? Why should one strive to go faster and farther in the race that is life. The fact that life is a race is undeniable. So why should we run harder. Is it for yourself? Is it for others?  Does earning a better salary that you neighbour make you feel better? Is it the only reason why you should try to be better. That is a topic for another time I guess.

Last day in No. 14

9 months is a long time. Tomorrow I leave No. 14, Sai Pooja Avenue and move onto VijayShanti. What has this period of time meant for me. Lots of memories form the last 9 months come flooding into my mind as I look back. This period has been covered in 2 collages but there is still so much to record.

The prominent memories will probably be the morning shifts to DLF, the jams sessions with Srinivas, and the booze weekends. I enjoyed this period of my life. Even though I have a feeling that I’m stuck right now, there have been brighter days gone past and I will leave this place with good memories. This is  definitely a  big change and I must treat it as such.

This past year has introduced lots of changes in me. The seeds sown in Mangalore definitely blossomed in Pooja Avenue. My drive for productivity…

Such a sad thing that I couldn’t complete this post. Would have been a good one.